One Response to Tragedy and Grief

I sit here in my comfortable home and realize that my almost 8 years in Virginia have been at times chaotic. The month before I moved here, my father passed away after an extended illness.

Ten months after moving here a cousin close to my age passed away unexpectedly.

Then in October 2005, a pastor friend in Waco passed away unexpectedly. He was electrocuted during a baptism. He was 33, had a wife and children. More grief!

In December 2005, a very dear friend died in Waco. He was 44, healthy, and died in his sleep. No one knows why.

In the Spring of 2006, my aunt (the mother of the cousin above) passed away after a time in the hospital.

Then in the summer of 2006, one of my best friends died in a plane crash. More grief!

In 2007, there was the tragedy at Virginia Tech and the death of Jerry Falwell.  Even more grief and sadness.

Many of these tragedies and experiences of grief have been documented on my blog.  I am sure there are others, but I can't recall them at the moment. 

Then comes Friday, December 14. A sick person kills almost 30 people on the campus of school in Newtown, Connecticut.

The news of the event makes many people numb, angry, even scared.  I don't know how to respond. I mean, so many lives ended in an instance.

How do you move on? What do you do?

I feel so (what's the word?) angry, upset, sad. . . . I'm not sure what to say.

The shock of hearing about these untimely deaths (is death ever timely?) is bad enough, but this sudden bit of bad news has hit some people harder than I would have imagined. You see, grief comes knocking on our door, and he (Grief) was not expected. We weren't prepared, in fact we were getting ready for the celebration of the birth of Jesus, the Prince of Peace.  We were in the middle of celebrating Hanukkah, the festival of lights and of dedication in which the story of a mighty miracle by God is told.  And in the midst of these holy seasons, Grief came for a visit!

As a result, we don't know how to act or what to say!  Some of us are actually in shock!

Grief often shows up at the most inopportune time. He is seldom a welcome guest and even more rarely an invited one. He walks in unannounced and tries to take over the household. Grief immobilizes you. It makes you stop and hurt. I guess grief is useful, but when you are experiencing it you just want it to stop. You want the uninvited pest to go away. Something important was taken away without our permission!

Grief has come to us, he came uninvited. We will walk a while with Grief, probably in silence. In the end, we will still miss our friends or family members, but hopefully we will cherish life more.

Grief is not my friend, but he helps in some ways, I guess. Grief came knocking on our door, and we didn't check to see who it was before we answered. Now Grief is a guest in our homes again. How long he'll stay is anybody's guess. He'll leave quietly one day and the only evidence that he was there will be the memory of our missing friends and a few tear-filled tissues. Grief will go, but hopefully he will leave us wiser and more grateful.

Don't misunderstand me . . . I'm still confident in God's character.

I know God is faithful and good.

But this whole thing is just so wrong.

I hate death.

Yes, I hate it.

On the day when Death and Hades are kicked into the bottomless pit, I will stand and cheer. I will dance about wildly, flinging my arms and body in all sorts of directions in praise of a great accomplishment--greater than any touchdown, home run, or pay raise. I will celebrate madly the final death of Death. I long for the day.

For now, we will pray and grieve, though.

On the other hand, please remember that your grief is not in vain. Let it work a good work in you. Don't use it as an excuse to turn to anger or bitterness, but rather use it as a reminder to cherish those around you more, to revel in the friendships, the relationships, the life you have today.

Let grief drive you to enjoy the good in life today! Let it push you to a kind and merciful God who knows how to see you through it.

Let grief be the tool that causes you to appreciate life.

Life is precious, may we remember to cherish it and to nurture it.

I know, it is time to turn off the rant. You've heard enough.

Remember to pray for the community of Newtown, Connecticut and the friends and families who are hurting now.

Remember to express your own grief (or anger or sadness), to develop an appreciation for life.  You are precious.So are those around you. Cherish them, cherish the moments, the "little" things.

Okay, I'm done.  I'm praying for mercy and grace in this time.  May the Prince of Peace chase sadness away and give us true peace.  Blessings!

Thanks for reading!