It isn't fair!

“It isn’t fair!” I hear these words more often than I can count from my children every day. Usually the complaint has to do with some “cherished” position, or some privilege, or some opportunity, or whose turn it is to “go first,” etc. More often than not, the cry is one for justice but from a strictly partisan or selfish position. Given the smaller piece of cake, the child exclaims the unfairness and unrighteousness of life. Offered an opportunity that seems less than satisfactory, the sibling rails to the parents about the need for equality, or fairness, or justice, in the present situation.

We’ve all endured moments of injustice. We were overlooked for a promotion or unjustly removed from a position. We expected more than we got, we worked hard and received a lower wage. Maybe it was a relationship that promised so much better than we received. Maybe we were overlooked in one of our rare moments of success. Maybe our idea was attributed to another without a concern for our opinion or sense of fairness.

Maybe you’ve lost a loved one at an untimely time in an unpleasant manner. As I write these words, a cousin lies “near death” after some routine surgery on his back. He is a fine fellow, a generous man, a husband and a father. He has accomplished much with his life, but he continued to show a type of humility rarely found in a person of success. He is what we may call in America “well off,” at the very least he lives comfortably with his wife and children. And yet, here he is, suffering silently near death as the doctors and family decide what to do next.

I want to scream at God “It’s unfair! He doesn’t deserve this situation! His wife and kids don’t deserve this injustice.” I cry out my dissatisfaction not as an objective judge, but as a person who has a stake in the outcome. My cousin is one of my extended family with whom I feel I share a bond beyond blood. I recently moved to Virginia, where he lives, and I hoped to renew our relationship and even hopefully deepen it. I feel shortchanged by the circumstances, I feel like it isn’t fair.

In my feelings of injustice, I cry out to God for a boon of grace, for a favor that (in all honesty) I don’t deserve. Yet, I want it. I want my cousin to live. Will God grant it? I don’t know.

Life is unfair at times. Injustice happens. God seems silent and life seems dull. I don’t always get the biggest piece of cake. What do I do after I have registered my disappointment with God? I live. I breathe in and out. I move on to the next thing. I trust that even when the outcome doesn’t suit my plans, still my Father has good things in store.

Life isn’t easy, treat each day as a precious gift. I have learned in the last 10 months that this physical existence we experience is much more fragile than we imagine. I do not know when my time may come. I have no way of predicting what will happen, but I know the character of the One who does. He is faithful, he is trustworthy, and, perhaps most importantly, he has himself suffered outrageous injustice so that when we cry “It isn’t fair!” he not only hears, but he empathizes. He understands, he hears, he cares. God may not always act the way we want him to in our situations, but he is never so aloof as to be unloving or uncaring. Jesus suffered so that I could live. I’m alive because he died. More importantly, I have the hope of resurrection because he didn’t stay in the grave. Is life unfair? Yes, but God is just, loving, merciful, and he is here. Thanks be to God for his inexpressible gift!

Addendum (06-07-05)—Last night, my cousin passed away surrounded by his family. God is still good, but I am sad.

This topic is heavy, I want to put it down now.

Thanks for reading!